There’s been some murmuring that witches are putting hexes on Trump and stuff. So, um, pound me the witch drums, I say.
Guys, remember this: You have a dick. That doesn't mean you have to act like it.
For the first time in over year, I finally have it in me to start writing some comedic headlines. News has been so...
HEADLINE: Dude with beard, average body weighs in on body positivity.
Saw this last night before going to sleep, and it felt right. Well, Left technically, but right.
Ok. I'm gonna say it. This administration is so stupid. There. Done.
When two of your homeboys get indicted and this is the best response you can muster. God save the queen and Putin!...
Me, Myself, and I: The Dope. I strike again. At myself.
Remember to go outside and blast this at the heavens today with an 80s stereo and proper sunglasses. #eclipse2017...